A Call to be Still

As long as I have been a Christian I have imagined the peace and awe I would feel as I listened at the feet of Jesus. Today I came as close as I believe I will this side of Heaven. Mama Maggie Groban was the personification of Jesus. She was humble, strong, gentle, courageous, comforting, irresistable, and motivating. You could not listen to her and not be compelled to action. Her time to speak to us was a wake up call to all that we are gifted with here in the west and that we need to slow down and be still in order to hear God. She was not trying to get you to have her call, rather she drew you to desire your own call. To desire to sit at the feet of our Lord and simply experience His presence. To first silence your body, then to silence your tongue, after you silence your tongue then you must silence your thoughts in order to hear your heart, next to silence your heart in order to listen to your spirit, and finally to silence your spirit so that you may listen to His. If we are unable to achieve this time of quiet we will never know what God truly desires for us to do.

Mama Maggie spoke truth about so many things we all desire to achieve and be. I long to be elegant but I already am if I love. Love is giving until it hurts and forgiving. Mama reminded me that forgiveness is not between me and another person but rather it is between me and My Father. He alone knows my heart and sees the truth of my essence. We all desire somewhere inside to be a hero. But Mama says that we can each be a hero. All we have to do is what God desires us to do. When we do that we honor Him as we can in no other way. Finally, I was reminded that I did not choose where I was born or the circumstances I was born into but I alone choose whether to be a saint or a sinner. I choose. Me. God speaks but I choose. Choose to comply. Choose to ignore. Choose to act. Choose to obey even if it seems ridiculous, to fly in the face of reason. I choose to follow.

Mama Maggie created a longing in me. She was used to stir my spirit and launch a craving in me to commune with my God and find His will for me. To stop striving on my own and to simply be still. Then to go and do what I know I am to do. Be who I was created to be and do what only I was called to do.

It's All New... Again

2011. It does not seem possible that another year has slipped through my fingers. Another year of goals not met, dreams not fulfilled. I am still the same. I have not done what needs to be done to better my life and the life of my family. BUT there were victories. I went to school ON CAMPUS at DeSales. I mingled with the young 'uns and survived to tell about it. I did well, too. Dean's List with room to spare in my GPA. This is an important step in securing our family's future. And Dale has done well in school and I feel that I have done a lot to help him succeed by doing all the running with the kids, etc. But I can be a better wife and a better mother. I can be a better friend, sister, teacher, employee, etc. But first, I need to be a better child of God. I need to spend my time reacquainting myself with God and His ways. That is my focus for 2011, to become entralled with Him and His ways rather than my own. To learn to trust Him, which I have no reason not to, as He has always met our needs and surpassed every one of my expectations. Trust is my biggest issue and how can I trust anyone else before I learn to trust God? This year may be the most pivotal yet as I learn anew what it means to walk by faith and not by sight. I want to be a History Maker. I want to fulfill my destiny and achieve my purpose.


I will close with this:

History Maker
by Martin Smith

Is it true today that when people pray
Cloudless skies will break
Kings and queens will shake
Yes it's true and I believe it
I'm living for you

Is it true today that when people pray
We'll see dead men rise
And the blind set free
Yes it's true and I believe it
I'm living for you

I'm gonna be a history maker in this land
I'm gonna be a speaker of truth to all mankind
I'm gonna stand, I'm gonna run
Into your arms, into your arms again
Into your arms, into your arms again

Well it's true today that when people stand
With the fire of God, and the truth in hand
We'll see miracles, we'll see angels sing
We'll see broken hearts making history
Yes it's true and I believe it
We're living for you

I will be a History Maker. I will live for Him, in faith, worry free. My God has it in His hands.